Your life is limited, don’t waste it living someone else’s.
I used to watch A LOT of TV…
There were days where I would watch episode after episode of whatever series I was in to at the time.
I still occasionally have a day where I go through a few episodes like this… but it’s when I know I need some down time and to stop thinking.
Before, though. I used TV as a means to escape.
It was a way for me to forget who I was for a moment… and often, pretend I was someone else (usually the hero role).
I did this because that’s who I wanted to be in my life.
I really wanted to be the confident person who went out and did crazy stuff… who challenged the status quo.
But I wasn’t.
I was far from it. In fact, I was shy as hell.
You see, during this time for me, I was living vicariously through fictional characters. I was meeting my needs through someone else. Through a story. Not through my own life.
We all have certain needs in life that must be met. The best explanation of this I have come across is Tony Robbins 6 Core Needs.
The needs are; Certainty, Variety, Connection, Significance, Growth and Contribution.
We will meet these needs in one way or another no matter what.
HOW we meet these needs, however, can be either in a way that is resourceful or un-resourceful.
I was meeting my needs for certainty and variety through watching characters on TV. Because I hadn’t learnt yet how to meet them in a resourceful way.
Now I know more.
Rather than living someone else’s life. I’m daringly living my own. Meeting all my needs in a really resourceful way.
I’ll give you a few examples;
The way I see it, we all have different ‘vehicles’ in life that we meet our needs through. For example, one ‘vehicle’ might be Motherhood.
I’m a mum and I meet all the 6 core needs through being a mum. I meet these needs in a resourceful way on a really high level.
My business is also another ‘vehicle’ for me to meet these needs. Again, I meet all 6 in a resourceful way in my business.
I volunteer with the Ambulance and it serves as another of my vehicles for meeting these needs. Each need is met in a way that is fulfilling for me.
There are more, but I think you get the point, right?
Does that make sense?
Back when I was living my life through TV, I was meeting the need for Certainty and Variety in an un-resourceful way because it meant I wasn’t moving myself forward.
I’m curious to know what your vehicles are for meeting these needs in a resourceful way.
If you can identify at least 5 vehicles in your life that you meet all your needs resourcefully through, your on the right track!
If not, it’s time to find some wheels!
A great way to start, if you’re feeling that you are lacking in vehicles is to start volunteering for an organisation. It will build up your confidence in a number of areas. It might be helping out at an Op Shop once a week or joining a community group. Maybe you’re into sport and you choose to help out a local sporting club.
The possibilities are endless.
If you would like some more clarity around the 6 core needs write a comment below with your questions!
OR Join my Facebook Group – Confidence, Now! FREE Tips and Trainings